Monday, December 7, 2009

10 reasons to feel good after your break-up

1) 1) You don’t have to pinch your face to bring out that pink blush when he confesses his love to you in the most corniest way, thinking he has turn the world upside down for you, proposing in the most romantic way that the world has ever seen….(when you are just wondering—“Are these lines picked from Moulin rouge?..Or is it notebook…duh!!)

2) 2) You can just give yourself a break from listening to his perpetual brags of how he tamed a wild anaconda, how he swam through the engleesh channel…. & pretending you are with a HERO!!!!!!!....sigh…keeping the constant “awwww” expression on your face, with occasional ‘oh my God...really???! my!...n blah blah!...(bull shit!...the jaw badly hurts, keeping that phony expression intact)

3) 3) You don’t have to smile coyly with gratitude when he picks up the grossest gift available on planet earth which probably your irritating neighboring spinster granny would have worn it eons back & still would have counted as outdated & fugly…gross! (Worse still, when he expects you to put on the next time he sees you…spare me the horror...Jesus!)

4) 4) You don’t have to pick up a salad with low carb, low fat, and low cal dressing, when he is proudly gormandizing on French fries, burgers, & hinting at your burgeoning hips & suggesting you names of gyms, health clubs.....(i wonder we never point out their ugly blackheads on their even ugly face, their dark circles, their not-so-john Abraham kinda-body, disheveled hair …then why the hell should be a look-alike of kate Moss..I believe many would agree on this—‘a butterscotch ice-cream tastes way better than any guy’s saliva’ :P)

5) 5) You can give your deceptive tongue a rest by not giving the ‘honey!..I have a very bad headache’ excuse….or ‘I dint mean to hurt you baby…I am just cranky these days, blame my PMS not me’ & the biggest one ‘you are everything, that I had ever imagined in my dream guy, I am so lucky’ ( a few extra notes of mahatma Gandhi printed paper, a posh 4 wheeler, & regular trips to sexy night clubs wouldn’t have harmed much though)…& not to mention.. “Baby!..U r so good at it”eiwww!...

6) 6)You don’t have to tickle yourself to laugh at his fucked up jokes which sometime seems like he has forgotten the punch line….but all you can say is gosh!...u r so witty!...wink! wink!...

7) 7) You don’t have to act dumb to boost his "MALE" ego, (not my fault if I am born as a smart n sexy chick…n by the way baby, I know who the finance minister of India is, the answer of ‘x’ to the power zero, & even who wrote the book midnight’s children)

8) 8)You are freed from the oh so boring events of meeting his ass friends who just cant stop praising him like they are being paid by him on per hour basis to lie & rot in hell for committing one of those 7 deadly sins of lying incessantly…phew! but U are expected to keep nodding your head in disbelief & steal glances of pride with your lover boy ….I wonder, if he is this good, then why is he not with Katrina or kareena? why on earth is he stuck with me...

9) 9) You don’t have to burn your ears by listening to the endless sagas about his momma...his mommy is this…that…n what not…but why are we talking of ethics & culture at this context, I wonder if his mommy approves of everything he does under the sheets?? :P

1010) You can reach out for the dark chocolate pastry resting in your fridge at 3 am without raising any jerk's eyebrows.

There are 3.5 billion potential fishes out there…..all you have to do is turn, focus, bat eyelid, smile….game on! :D

(All the incidents/characters featured on this article are purely non fictional, any resemblance/similarity to any person living or dead(hopefully :D) is deliberate, without a pinch of regret, thank you n FO)

I aint a bitch, I just keep falling for dogs every now & then….

Spice less monotonous life be damned


Wednesday, September 16, 2009

No “man’s” zone ;)

Some great (or may be not so great) woman once quoted—“Forget love, I'd rather fall in chocolate”…..the speculations that she attracted could have been like this—“what a typical girl”…”what a phony creature”...Common every one wants love…is it?? Isnt it?? I wonder…..we meet some one worth meeting, we get close in few meetings, those meetings turn to be an eye opener to expose almost everything about your partner, thereafter there are less meetings cause the curiosity/charm is lost…less meetings=less interaction=loosing interest that implies we start detesting each other like anything…n ultimately we turn to our first love-chocs(butterscotch milkshake for me;))..The world is filled with great many people; I have had a chance to meet a few in my 20 years of lifetime & had my share of going weak at knees, sighing,nauseating abhorring n blah! Blah! I hereby list a bunch of guys we get to see in our day today lives, the pros n cons of dating em..…categorically speaking...

1st category-

The pimpled face geek-

pro- wowww…he is so smart!~~~sigh!..batting eyelashes~~..hez got a knowledge of everything/anything under the sun.

Con- ur frens say—u r seeing him?? HIM??...HIIIMMMM??...r u kidding??...

2nd category-

The rich spoilt brat-

Pro- welcome to the hip! Chic! Life!!…more parties…more gifts...More fancy car rides to sexy restaurants…more—what not..

Con-1) one fine morning u may wake up explaining him—‘darling...its not the moolah!...i love you for what you are…n then wonder “what is he exactly?”

3rd category-

The hot bodied model-

Pro- do I even need to fill this space? :p

Con- on your very first date you get to hear-“Ur place or mine”?? if not anybody’s then f$%k off! NEXT PLZ!...

The rock-rocker/hip-hopper/rap-rapper-

Pro- its so “IN”

Con- after listening to a poorly recorded cd when you are just tempted to pluck out your ears n kick their butts for the bad cheeky lyrics & worse dressing sense—u just say-- woah! Amaaazing man!..dude! u r the next Billy Joel!..i swear..u r gooooooooooiiinggg a longggggggg way” n so am I K(in the opp direction though)

The fitness freak -

Pro- feels good ;)

Con- the moment you are done ordering that extra portion of double toned milkshake with ice cream…n about to gormandize a HUGE chunk of extra cheese burger..u get a sweet suggestion.. ‘Honey!..There is a nice gym opening nearby, why don’t u…..?? “U think I am fat? @#$&^*&(

The old is Gold…nope diamond man!-

Pro- inheritance….money…inheritance…money…

Con—yeah…yeaah.....aaeaaaaahhh…ahhhhhhhhhh… …YEAH????...u done? so soon??

The religious guy-

Pro- your parents love him: O

Con- “the kind of ‘shraddha’ I have for you, makes me worship the divine being that thrives in you, lets get ourselves entangled in a thread of love keeping the sun…the moon as a sakshi to our expression of love & passion…eeewwww!!....marrying you??? To wear sari bindi, kangan,chuddi for the rest of my life.....naaao way…but who the f$%k is shraddha n what about sakshi?...

The dandy dud…errr…I mean dude

Pro- get discounts at salons for double booking.

Con- “Dahling!..u r such a nut…u don’t know the difference between beige & offwhite..? n puhleez move away from the mirror, its time to touch-up my hair…”

The poetry in motion-

Pro- sigh!...sooooooooooww romantic..sigh!..

Con- ‘ the aroma in the air is singing an eulogy to our love,

Beckoning us to plunge into the sea of sins

The flutter of the butterfly, the language of the dove

Will testify the Elysian love I have for you….

I jest not…you are the reverie I wake up to..the voice I slumber to…the touch I crave for….”

OH my god!.what was that???.Can I have an interpreter..a dictionary..anythin??....

the defensive guy from defense-

pro- you receive salutes from people, you are treated like a lady :D

con(s)- expectations are so high that, sometimes people forget their real worth,

no contact with the outer world,you are pushed to stay in a dark dungeon where you have to shut yourself off completely, phew!...

pseudo sense of pride--jesus!....the irony is u are not "THE" man

you have to keep your ears n what not available to them to listen to their perpetual brags about how they won a war, how ethical, cultured their family is, how great their lives are....

a good girl being a rare sight at such places, things sometimes take a very desperate & needy turn :D which is like yuck!!!.....

Well…well..well…this is it…till date…but I will leave the section open and keep updating it

I wonder, in which category do I fall in a similar kinda list made by guys :p

Thursday, September 3, 2009

The forbidden fruit!...;)

The lights went dim…the whiff of freshness in the air grew stronger……umpteen violins started playing a tuneful music in the backdrop……… I gaze at my own reflection in the mirror….stark imperfections stare back at me…I smile at it….I love it…I am falling in love with myself all over again…the benighted sky up above looks beautiful to me...the gloomy clouds bring in an air of sensuality awaiting for the divine touch…the soft drizzle kisses the soil with utmost passion….the green foliage dance in joy to reciprocate the love of rain…..the enthralling touch of nature enamors me……I wonder….I introspect….I ask myself the million dollar question……..Before I could answer, the land below my feet is swept off….is it something in me that has changed my vision of life…or is it the mysterious night outside that has cast his irresistible spells on me??.....I am stupefied seeing my own instincts….I am all game to dive into the pool of passions heightened by the downpour outside….the roaring waves ahead me look splendid reflecting the enigmatic turbid sky….I wonder…are the waves crying out a loud joyous lullaby of passion..Or are they playing the sonorous drums to alert the denizens of this sinful earth to not taste the ‘forbidden fruit’….its tempting…its alluring…..its confounding…its blurring…should I??..Should I not??..Why must I...why mustn’t I?..How does it matter anyway?????? stark imperfection blurrrrrrrrrssssssss…………..the thunder storm outside my dark room sends a jolt of current in me…there is no point in mulling over matters that we have little control on…I see a streak of red color in my jaded life..I appease myself by repeating…rules are meant to be breached…promises are made to be broken….liaisons are built to be crushed…forbidden fruit is planted to be uprooted, tasted n relished the venom inside to touch the sinful facet of your earthly life………
I suddenly snap out of my reverie….the rain outside has stopped…the sky has turned depressingly crimson….i anticipated for that picturesque moment to come back…I hold back for 2 secs…2 secs seemed like ages,…is it the after effects of having munched the forbidden fruit…is it the venom? long do I have to wait…..should I? why should I?...or why should I not? does it matter anyway...I am a human…a sinned angel..I err…I also indulge in beautiful mistakes to treat my senses….but now the time has come…I have to repent…I have to pay for my deeds….for diving into the pool of passions & plucking out the forbidden fruit…for letting the poison of life rolling down my guileless eyes……..

Sunday, May 31, 2009

A fading dream(2)

I grope in the dark to reach for the moony visions u left in my eyes
For that lost dream, my blinding soul, bleeds & cries…
I go back to re-live all that you have ever said to me
For they keep coming back to haunt me….
I only wish you could sense the rumbling of your own heart, & embrace the fairy-tale love that’s now fallen apart…..

I never knew the vividness of our love until you walked past me to a farther land
For I believed you would come back the next day to claim my love & hold my hand…
I see you in my dreams, I hear your voice inside me, and I feel you through the air I breathe
My heart writhes in pain with no one to swathe.
I only wish you hadn’t impregnated the beautiful illusions into my mind
& had released me from the unbreakable bond of desire that has got us entwined…

I try to be a stoic, flushing out the dark image that pulls me to you, that needs your comforting touch that yearns for a pleasant musical word of love
For I am tired of being stripped off the bygone life that was deprived of the murky side of love & the grimy phase of lost love…..
I only wish I could accept the love that loves me than chasing the love that once loved…
I only wish you could read the silence on my lips & the vacant gaze on my eyes…
I only wish you could love me back &bring back those shiny illusions or make & never leave me this vulnerable…
Or bring the time to a halt to cease the pain of the tears of blood that can never be wiped…..

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

the moment of truth...!

My mum says, ‘life is about lending yourself, making compromises, defying & then adjusting to the situation. The sooner you accept the irony, the better you cope in the times of crisis’ .like a rebel, I always was, I kept contradicting her every time I was asked to act in a specific fashion constricting myself into the mould of societal norms. But sadly, never could I see an utter defiant, petulant & self opinionated person like me fitting into it. Partly because, way back in school, I never had the need to make myself change to be accepted, never was I expected to be politically correct to be adored, I was a rule-breaker, I was a nuisance then, slipping outa the class, roaming around the town with my shriek 2-wheeler with friends, gormandizing junk food, having brawl fights with the guys in my class ,n bullying over the less popular people was what I did the best in school but yet I was loved by many a people. Hailing from a small town , & born to a family who are as affectionate as they come, & having grown in a way...Without any restriction whatsoever …I was like a happy butterfly spreading its colors to the world, I had no clue about the satires & grieves that life thrusts on u, I usually kept myself occupied by weaving unattainable dreams in the broad daylight. Shifting & shuffling between many bizarre career options, from defense to engineering & many in between, I tried my best to be practical by deciding to pursue fashion design course in future. All I wanted was to look hep, drive a swanky convertible & brush shoulders with the la di da stars of the society. The whole of Cuttack believed that I would make it big in this field somehow. Post 12th grade, I started filling in forms to get into the premium institutes offering fashion designing…….The first jolt of disappointment was unleashed when I saw part of my 5 years old dream taking a backseat when I was rejected by the best institutes of India-NIFT & NID in the final round of the selection procedure. Through bouts of confusion, & with the encouragement from my dad ,my chemistry teacher & my drawing teacher, I finally decided to enroll myself in pearl, Chennai, I was apprehensive about the place & the fact that I was gonna be among the first batch of pearl, Chennai..This was definitely not what I had envisioned for myself. But somehow, I managed to convince myself to survive it for the next 4years. I left behind my home, my people, my language, my love, my childhood, my life…..n started my journey of pearl with huge packed bags on the day of my 18th birthday, 29th July 2006 to an unknown land of aliens, filled with people I can less relate to, to a world which looks flashy from far…. I still am trying to figure out whether it was supposed to be my best or my worst birthday ever……………On entering the premises of pearl, I was unperturbed to meet many different people from different places. I suddenly felt introvertish when I saw the people with whom I was gonna spend the next 4years of my life. I dint feel the need to socialize, I just had one thing in mind whether a stubborn person like me would survive the hostel guided by rooooolesss n regulationssss…..the way I am…I feel claustrophobic, when I am asked to do things in a manner it should be done, I might as well have turned up doing the same if I were on my own…but I don’t want people telling me, what to do & what not to..Even my parents have never bothered to do so; I am not used to being ruled by dictators. While doing the first assignment in college, on my first day in pearl, I realized the paper was wet with my tears, those two drops taught me to be stoic, taught me to wipe them away & accept the new life…..unlike earlier times, I didn’t call up my mommy to tell her how much I miss her, even when I was dead sure that she too was welling up her eyes missing me, I suppressed my craving to reach out for a pair of strong arms of any friend of mine to hug me tight…. I rather continued with my assignment…………………As days passed, I was lucky enough to be staying with my sister, rather than in a hostel, after one year of slogging day in & day out, I got to get a clear picture of what the life of a designer is…its not all that flamboyant as I had imagined. the language barrier in Chennai, where a non chennaiite is often touted as ‘hindiaa’ or ‘northie’ & sometimes treated indifferently, mocked just for the petty fact that u don’t speak their local lingo & are adamant to call the national lingo-Hindi as your own, taught me to love my country even more…I relate to hindi much more than I do to oriya…specially when people address me as a north-Indian not just an Indian, when people here prefer to cheer for Srilankan cricket team when playing against India, & when almost whole of my class was in ignorance during the period of mayhem in Mumbai attacks, but got a week off when there were chaos in Srilanka. Everything made me feel more responsible towards my country, which I will definitely work it out someday when I am in position to do something. Thanks to Pearl, Chennai.Foundation year passed through thick & thin then started the actual career route, where the rules of slogging were defined in prominent letters. Unending assignments, meeting deadlines, groupisms, less friends, no family……..2nd year brought along the air of true fashion designing. I suddenly came across a new word ‘professionalism’...Which has hell lotta deep meaning associated with…but if you stick to it, you definitely reach the peak of success in this field…I always did what I liked, designing was a passion for me, never did I feel the need to market it & sell a part of me (my idea), I couldn’t bear the thought of selling my art for money. But I had to accept the irony.2007 post august was the darkest period of my life on personal grounds, psychologically; physically & emotionally I yearned for a support to pass through this, which obviously I didn’t get….rather the ill habits that had conjured in me over time ,took a toll over my academic life or to be precise my attendance,….I was debarred temporarily….I still remember the day when I was making merry for giving a very good submission, correctly at that very moment I was summoned by the dean who broke the news……that was the first time, I was so vulnerable in front of my parents that my condition, my mistake made them cry..N for the first time I spent my new year & Christmas shut out from my school friends in utter despair… this phase, everything fell back to normalcy…To be honest, how much I abhor to be in this place, city, surrounding, I cant miss to acknowledge the fact that this 3yrs of my life have posed a very crucial period of my life, if I hadn’t been bitched about, hated by my colleagues for my unpredictability & sharp mood swings…I wouldn’t have ever learnt the flaws in my character traits & never realized the importance of behaving professionally. if I hadn’t been in company with superficial, ooh la la time pass friends, I would never have understood the meaning of honesty, trust that’s involved in the making of a relationship as pure as friendship, I used to take my school friends for granted, but now they are a part of me, if I hadn’t stayed away from my parents, crying all through the night craving for their hugs n kisses, I wouldn’t have learnt to stand independently & take care of myself…moreover the distance sharpened the relationship, & made me realize how lucky I am to be born to such parents who are ready to stifle their own wishes to fulfill the tiniest dream nourishing in the eyes of their selfish daughter…if I hadn’t been betrayed by the person whom I considered my God, my future, my life, I would never have become an atheist, a self dependent, more confident…& this taught me to fall in love with my own self…n made me discover that I find solace in writing, giving vent to my emotions through words became my new passion, If I hadn’t been a victim of prejudice, I would never have realized the stark difficulties of life, now I am geared to face the big bad world, If I hadn’t been discriminated on the grounds of language & place, I wouldn’t have thought of trying to become an asset to my own country…3yrs already over..just one more year to go to graduate… I don’t know what the future awaits, but I don’t want to be among the rat race, the only ambition I have as of now is to be contented n happy…I don’t want to grow old to find out that I have missed all sweet happy things of my life running after gold…My mother was always right, life is indeed about making few compromises, making you flexible n most importantly accepting both good n the can’t always wear a pair of pink tinted glass& expect the world to walk according to your terms. Now when I see myself on the mirror, I see a new, improved, matured Ipsita…who no longer wells up her eyes for petty reasons, no longer expects unexpected things, who loves her people to the core…values relationships, people, & tries to be at least a good human being, if not an ideal one….. its like opening your eyes after a spicy dream that has few a smiles n few tears….this is life…a cuddly dream or a nightmare…you are a part of it…you have to live it with a smile, that’s the best you can o for your own goodwill.

the "In" factor

The perfect 10 body, flawless complexion, shining mane glory topped with the graceful moves that can make any guy skip a beat....yeah! Yeah!! They got all! From name, fame, physical appearance (psst-they are also fortunate enough to be wrapped in arms of guys we can only gawk at)...admit it!..every morning when we stare at our mirrors scrutinizing our flaky skin, unmanageable hair, extra bulge...we wish to wake up, the next day, as one of those beautiful models/celebs who adorn the front pages of every fashion magazine, & manage to slip into the size that we could only dream of, by crowing about things that forces our lips to mutter a ‘sigh’. Moreover, it elevates our agony when we hear their statements of maintaining that look ,confessing to be big time foodies......Right- we all want to personify the oh so “in” anorexic size zero kate moss image. kareena is the latest addition to the size 0 rage which is catching up very fast in India along with the other western countries. i, myself being a girl, feel guilty every time I put anything in my mouth, be it healthy, unhealthy whatsoever. You feel like a thief, if you treat your tongue in public. you ll be disillusioned with people from left & right, east & west staring at you with eyes showing....’jeez-have-a-look-at-your-burgeoning-hips-before-gorging-on-that-pc-of-cake’ look. Well to be honest, this is one of the reasons why I avoid eating at junk joints; i prefer packing them up for home ;).Imagine, having a burger in public, u need to open your jaws like a huge heavy dinosaur to have a portion of it. There is nothing more embarrassing than this. lol. the clothing brands are doing their very best by pilling up plus sized garments on the racks of every good retail shop, but only a handful of people manage to get in there, because they are displayed on a completely different section of the store with huge..yeah large posters of plus sized women pasted confidently on the walls of the store, that scares off many women of that size, to go in there, so, they prefer, shopping in the normal section which have got normal & plus sizes in the same section.
There was a time when curves were the most prized physical attributes that one could ever have. The voluptuous curvy bod depicted in the Indian sculptures & mythology was the true representation of feminine beauty, whereas petite was taken to be a result of malnutrition. But now, the mantra is .’xxxs size rocks’!!! take on this current trend is, that one should keep the near to perfect image to models, comon!! they have 100s of people around them every second to take care of their bod, skin, nutrition, garments & what not, an average person like you & me dont have that kind of time, money & energy to spend on doing those, then why do we have to expect the results so extreme as that. Trust me on this, they are painted with loads of imported make-up, concealers to screen their zits, to look on tv,mag as they do. Even they complain of acne & dark circles. we shouldn’t constrict ourselves to that glossy illusion, rather we should focus on the positive factors in us. yep!!! thats what I tell myself everytime I catch my lips salivating at the smell of a freshly made double choco chip cookie, & eyes staring blatantly at the oh-so hot model adorning the poster displayed at the showroom next to the cookie shop. Well, again, I should believe that, models should look like models, a mom should look like a mom ,a corporate female should look like one, , while a fashion designer can look like anything she wants to ;-)