Wednesday, February 3, 2010

so be it !

1st jan 2010
Happy new year to me….another year just flew by, yet again leaving behind a trail of beautifully articulated moments in my life where I LOL’d, I sighed, I smiled,I shed those precious pearls…I gasped, and few that just made me wonder in awe…..After a huge gap of time, on the occasion of new year, I revert to my first love –“writing” to seek refuge from the frighteningly random thoughts that’s monopolizing my life lately & the occasional bouts of ups & downs … I wonder what do I write in this little space, There are so many words stifling in my mind that itches to come out,umpteen images in my heart waiting to be shown, so many colors urging to reach the canvas but do I have an honest listener?? Who do I address to?? What do I paint my colorless life with?? Do I have a pair of patient ears to listen to my endless yap, without judging me? Do I have the comfort of strong arms swaying me away from my creepy dark thoughts?? But Why do I care….when its totally completely, my own space…Its my life.. I deserve the right to mould it into any form I want to, since when have I become so needy to ask for someone to pull me out of the shell I have created for myself? Since when have I started living on others terms? Why do I need someone to be happy? Why do I have to hide my tears, gulping down the gush of anguish that comes up as a lump in my sore throat occasionally, without the fear of being exposed to the big bad world?....Why cant I let my hair loose & dance to the beautiful tune that the world around me is playing & just be free & happy,,,?? Why cant I go back time, when an ice-cream melted every hurdles in my simple life?? Why cant life be minus the wrath, the complicated emotions, competition, guilt, pain ………………why cant I wait for the warm rays of sun to kiss me on a wintry night of dark thoughts & furnish me with an enlightened life….They say ‘life is a sweet pain’…why cant I just gulp down the venom & laugh at the destiny that awaits me..
~Amen~

2 comments:

Abhi...The Insatiable... said...

First of all Happy new year gurl.:)

Simple but Random post...Thought provoking to say the least.

Something inside u thts pulling you down. In this post u are appearing out of the frame.All ppl have sweetness in their life ,that is what helps them to go on and on...It seems ur life's essence tht spark plug is missing.

Miss Ipsita Priyadarsini Mishra expecting a bull not to charge at you just because you are a vegeterian kind of funda will not work in today's rat race world netheir Aamir's "All izz well" will come to the solace.You are free and sensible enough to make right decisions for yourself.
Break the shell...Come out of it...Break the jinx and play the game of life. I know its gonna be a Cakewalk for you.

Enuff said...!

On the whole I liked the post.Raw but fresh.

Regards-
Abhi...$

P.S-->Above text is just my perception and should not be regarded as Standard by Default.
:p

Rohan said...

Belated happy new year !!

You can be whatever you want in life when your concious as well as sub concious mind wants it.

Sometimes our concious mind jus does not side with the other one and with time we learn to accept the alternate reality.

Try and be optimistic everyday, all the time, one day there ll be a day when u ll feel different, look at things differently and when u look back all u ll see is a 'lesson you learnt'.

What does not kill you makes you stronger, better, meaner and more well versed to handle situations in life

Best of luck !! I am sure you ll do it.

Ps: Would love to talk to you someday about your this post, i wanted to write something in similar lines but could not out of fear of being labelled 'weak'!!
Foolish me !!